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The Impact of PTSD on Family Members

Rona Ackerman, Social Worker and Psychotherapist, Deputy Director of ELAH Center for Coping with Loss, Grief and Trauma
15 June 2025

Post Traumatic Stress Disorder (PTSD) dramatically affects the life of people with the disorder as well as the lives of people close to them, who do not always succeed in understanding the meaning of the change that occurred in them. In addition, other family members occasionally find it difficult to understand their role, against unusual behaviors and reactions that undermine any home.  

Most therapeutic options currently available primarily pertain to people with PTSD themselves, with less attention paid to the broad impact of PTSD. It is important to remember that the support system of the person coping with PTSD itself becomes affected. For this reason, obtaining a broad response that takes into account all people who are in close proximity to the person with PTSD is critically important. The earlier that treatment and assistance is provided to other family members, the greater the chances that they will receive the relevant information and tools to support the relative with PTSD, while simultaneously themselves receiving support as secondary trauma victims.  

Post Traumatic Stress Syndrome (PTSD also known as Post Trauma), is a chronic reaction to a traumatic event that tangibly endangered the individual’s physical or mental well-being. PTSD symptoms are unique, and include, inter alia: 

  • Intrusion: Intrusive, unwanted memories of the event involuntarily come back. 
  • Heightened arousal: Increased alertness of potential stimuli in the environment that may involuntarily remind one of the traumatic event. 
  • Avoidance: From activity that may trigger the traumatic memory, initially from certain activity that are clearly reminiscent of the trauma and then avoiding other activities that seemingly have no connection to the event itself but are actually associated with the trauma for the person.  

Any son or daughter in your family dealing with PTSD definitely impacts not only them but also your life and the lives of the rest of the family. The article below will try to explain the various impacts on all areas of life and provide recommendations on how to deal with the difficulties and overcome this challenging period.  

How PTSD affects the family 

Emotional impact 

When one family member suffers from PTSD, other family members are emotionally affected and may experience helplessness, anger, sadness and frustration, alongside constant concern for the health and well-being of the member with PTSD. Stress is frequently addressed as chronic or persistent because of the occurrence of PTSD, how it manifests, as well as the frequency, intensity and timing of its occurrence. Additionally, in these situations, the closeness and intimacy between the person dealing with PTSD and the rest of their family may change and emotional responses may be extreme, poor, or change in an unregulated manner. 

Challenging patterns of communication 

Communication in the family changes, becoming more challenging. What had been simple and relaxed in the past has now become cautious and hesitant. Because it is not always possible to predict what will trigger a PTSD reaction, common practice is to ‘walk on eggshells to avoid feelings of being overwhelmed or difficulty. Spontaneity and authenticity are affected, and it is not always clear what effective support is for the person experiencing PTSD. 

Role changes in the family  

One family member coping with PTSD will result in other family members finding themselves taking on new roles within the family. Anyone with PTSD, who had until recently been independent and functional, may also find themselves dependent on other family members, requiring their assistance in performing various tasks. The more significant the family support is, the more that family members can rely on each other and cope with the challenges posed by PTSD over time. 

Other challenges in the family 

Coping with a family member with PTSD may pose more than a few new challenges, roles and tasks, including:  

  • Development of secondary trauma:

    when in proximity of someone who has experienced trauma, emotional and psychological reactions may develop that are affected by indirect exposure to the trauma and from close proximity to symptoms of PTSD being displayed by the affected person. This reaction, known as "secondary trauma”, involves deep emotional suffering, changes in perception (including the general sense of security), over-identification with the victim, for example by limiting and avoiding activities, as well as burnout and damage to interpersonal relationships. Secondary trauma frequently results in depression, anxiety, difficulty in emotional regulation, emotional exhaustion and diminished sense of efficacy. 

  • The borders of the home vs. social space

    In most cases, although significant change can be felt within the home in terms of atmosphere, and in the family member coping with PTSD, the demanding life outside and the daily routine continues as usual. This gap may spark questions and deliberations, such as whether and when to discuss what is going on. How much to expose this coping and to whom? On the one hand, an outside routine can provide stable ground that offers a sense of security. On the other hand, adjustments must be made since your reality has changed. As a result, it is only natural to feel isolated in a new situation and to have a deep personal conflict with regards to the involvement of other family members, employers, colleagues, etc.

  • Decision-making

    Living with a family member who suffers from PTSD involves more than a few operative issues that require that difficult decisions be made, such as type of suitable treatment, coordination of therapies and medical follow-up, arrangement of bureaucratic issues against the large systems, understanding of rights, money, etc. There are also other important decisions to be made such as the timing and manner in which children or younger siblings are informed.

  • Emotional and physical adjustments:

    the emotional and physical burdens faced by family members are many, diverse and unplanned. In one moment, you are burdened with the tremendous responsibility of caring for another person, forcing you to adapt to many changes in a short period of time. The nature and pace of the change frequently triggers tremendous anxiety and concern, with the primary concern being a ‘stranger will not understand’. Thus, much like the individual dealing with PTSD, you too are forced to adapt to a new reality that requires a different kind of investment than with what you were familiar with, flexibility, and adaptation, as well as a great deal of self-compassion, emotional support, and the acquisition of knowledge and tools that can help with the coping.

How to help a family member suffering from PTSD

אז איך בעצם אפשר לסייע לבן או בת המשפחה שמתמודדים עם ההפרעה? הנה כמה המלצות מעשיות שכדאי להכיר:

  • Acquisition of professional knowledge: Try to read and compile as much information about PTSD, its symptoms and possible repercussions as possible. To gain an in-depth understanding of PTSD, search for reliable and professional sources to understand the disorder. 
  • Connection to sources of assistance: it is important to encourage the family member to participate in support groups, professional workshops and therapies - individual, couple or family. 

  • Active listening: To try to create a safe, non-judgmental environment, to listen with empathy and to display a genuine desire to be there for them. 
  • Emotional availability: To be emotionally present, even if there is no need for continuous dialog. The very knowledge of a relative’s support can help. 
  • Encouragement of open communication: Honest, open discussions without pressure or coercion should be encouraged. 

  • Alleviating the daily burden: Try to help with daily tasks as much as possible, such as cooking, cleaning or anything that will help ease the burden for the family member. 
  • Professional supervision: Try to offer supervision for medical treatments, visits or bureaucratic procedures. 
  • Exhaustion of benefits: Offer help to investigate and manage social benefits, allowances and relevant entitlements. 

  • Encouragement of self-care: Practice techniques to alleviate stress, such as mindfullness, yoga or mediation. 
  • Maintaining mental health: Try to encourage activities that reinforce mental and physical health. 

  • Be patient: The recovery process is complex and takes time. 
  • Take care of yourself: Self-support is critical to continue to support others. 

Remember: Your support of a person coping with PTSD can be a decisive factor in the healing process. Attention, tolerance and love are the main keys. 

How to look after yourself as well 

If your family member is coping with PTSD, it is also important that you receive assistance and direction. 

Family members’ entitlement to treatment is derived from the circumstances of the traumatic event and differs in every case. You should therefore consult with professionals regarding the options available to family members. 

It is important that you check about disability pensions, special sick days, special leaves, recognition of the ‘primary caregiver’ status, economic and psychosocial assistance, reduction in taxes and various types of treatment. 

Eligibility should be comprehensively reviewed to exhaust the options offered to you in the community. 

For more information, contact counseling centers for families of persons with mental illness 

Do not be left alone to cope 

Living with a family member who suffers from PTSD may prove complicated and challenging. In an instant, reality changes due to the extreme impact of the traumatic event on the person who is dear to you. 

As a caregiver, your coping is often behind the scenes and sometimes invisible, so it may be extremely lonely and without recognition. Because of this, it is necessarily important to insist on obtaining help and not be left alone to cope with struggles in various areas.  

Contact professionals in the community to receive direction, knowledge and relevant tools, and work on obtaining emotional assistance and support to maintain long-term resilience and capability. Most importantly - make sure to focus on  yourself, understanding that support of you is not considered a ‘luxury’ but, first and foremost, a vital necessity for you and definitely for the person suffering from PTSD.