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Parenting Children with ADHD

Dr. Yuval Raveh, specialist in child and adolescent psychiatry, Director of the Department of Child and Adolescent Psychiatry at the Ministry of Health
19 February 2026

Receiving a diagnosis of ADHD can sometimes be difficult and confusing, stemming from the parents' personal, cultural, and social backgrounds. It is important to stop, breathe, understand the meaning of the diagnosis, and seek help from experts who understand the different aspects of parenting a child with the disorder.

Coping with a diagnosis of ADHD

Mismatched expectations of the child may increase the difficulty in accepting the diagnosis. In addition, the social stigma surrounding the disorder may cause repression and avoidance of treatment – ​​and harm the children. It is important to understand: The disorder is not under their control and there is no reason for shame.

Age-appropriate and eye-level explanation

The better you know the disorder and its symptoms, the better you will be able to deal with the complexities. The explanation should be adapted to the child's age, at eye level and without judgment. It is also important to talk about the medications directly and to encourage open dialogue about their difficulties and feelings.

The difficulty of coping

A combination of inclusion and setting boundaries supports healthy coping. Parental guidance can be of great help.

Refusal and resistance of children to treatment

Listening, inclusion, tailored information, consultation with professionals, and consistent cooperation may reduce resistance and encourage optimal treatment.

Concern for the future

Most often, the symptoms continue into adulthood – but with appropriate treatment, it is possible to succeed and realize potential. Some children will not even need treatment in adulthood.

Receiving a diagnosis that shows that your child has ADHD can bring up many emotions, some of which are complex. These feelings are natural and common and are influenced by personal background, family values, and the cultural environment from which you come. It is recommended to stop for a moment, digest the information, and learn about the phenomenon on your own or with the help of professional guidance, and only then take action. If you are using a professional, it is important that they understand and are familiar with the various implications of being a parent of a child with ADHD.

Coping with Receiving the Diagnosis

Naturally, many parents have expectations for their children, which do not always match the reality they face. For example, some families attribute central importance to academic success, and therefore the news of difficulty in this area may be unsettling and even difficult to contain.

Alongside this, ADHD can have behavioral, educational, and social consequences, and therefore a harmful stigma has been attached to it. This stigma makes it difficult to understand the phenomenon, deal with it effectively, and improve the child's quality of life. As a result of the stigma, there may be a tendency to repress, deny, hide, and ignore clear symptoms of the disorder that are harming the child and to prevent treatment that could alleviate and promote.

Like any other medical condition, ADHD is not a cause for shame and is not within the child's control. After diagnosis, if necessary, it is recommended to seek appropriate treatment. In addition, children are greatly influenced by their parents' perceptions of the interpretation of their condition. In other words, if you think that ADHD is a terrible thing, then even if you say that everything is fine, the children will feel your emotional stress. In these cases, it is worth seeking parental guidance.

How to Explain to Children That They Have ADHD

The better you know the disorder and its symptoms, the better you will be able to cope with the complexities. Upon receiving the diagnosis, it is recommended to read about the subject from qualified sources, and seek the help of professionals. Effective tools can improve coping and alleviate the challenges of the child.

After you, the parents, understand the disorder, it is time to explain it to your child. The explanation should be in simple words and in understandable language, according to the child's developmental stage. For example, with a 5-year-old child we will explain about difficulty sitting still throughout the session, while with a 17-year-old girl we can talk about restlessness and impulsivity.

Principles for talking to children about ADHD

  • Speak directly and simply, and use words they understand, such as difficulty sitting still, difficulty concentrating, and difficulty controlling themselves.
  • Avoid judgmental language such as "bad behavior", stupidity, clowning, and the like.
  • Talk openly about medication. Do not define the medications as "vitamins" or try to put them in food. It is worth having an open dialogue about expectations from the medication and possible side effects. Do not exaggerate or deny.
  • Emphasize that the treatment is intended to improve quality of life and not for the benefit of the system — meaning not so they will be good students or "good kids", but so they can reach their full potential and avoid frustration.
  • Keep the door open and invite your children to talk openly about difficulties, thoughts, and treatment.

Parental Coping Difficulty

Sometimes, when challenging behaviors appear in children, it can be difficult to behave in an empathetic and inclusive manner. On the other hand, at times parents may struggle to set boundaries for children who are dealing with various symptoms. It is important to remember that an inclusive and empathetic approach combined with setting boundaries will benefit the child.

Dealing with the environment

The question of whether to share your child's attention deficit disorder with others is a complex one, and there is no single right answer. However, when the symptoms are prominent, it can be assumed that it will be very difficult, if not impossible, to persist in hiding or ignoring the situation. It is worth thinking about the circles of sharing and deciding what feels right and appropriate for you:

Teachers and teaching staff

It is worth involving teachers, instructors in an extracurricular activity or counselors in a youth movement and explaining what to expect. It is important to emphasize that the demands on the child should not change because of the attention disorder.

Siblings

It is usually worth sharing with siblings because of the intensity of the relationship. It is worth remembering that honest and open dialogue, even on complex issues, is better than hiding and ignoring, in order to avoid short- and long-term consequences.

Friends

Good friends who accompany can be in touch like relatives, so open dialogue is also appropriate here. However, it is worth guiding children to think before sharing with distant people and to consider whether sharing will benefit them.

Refusal and resistance of children to treatment

Children's resistance to treatment is common. Children do not want to be different from their peers, especially boys and girls who have already experienced social struggles or suffer from quirks or abnormalities. Sometimes they simply do not want to take medication, or the medication itself makes them uncomfortable. Things that can encourage open and positive discussion about treatment:

  • Listening and inclusion
  • Providing support and help
  • Conversation at eye level
  • Collaboration with professionals
  • Patience
  • Listening and inclusion: Listen patiently and try to understand concerns and resistance. It is important to give space to emotions and not dismiss them.
  • Providing support and help: Give space to what bothers your children—this encourages and strengthens them. Look for appropriate solutions; for example, if there are side effects, you can look for ways to relieve them or try changing the medication in consultation with the treating physician.
  • Conversation at eye level: Be sure to explain the importance of treatment in a simple and clear way, using real-life examples. At an older age, you can ask how they feel with the medication and what happens without it.
  • Dealing with the fear of being different: Children may wonder why they take medication while their friends do not. It is important to explain that everyone has different challenges, and in their case there is an option to make coping easier.
  • To share or not to share? It is important to explain to children that the choice to share is theirs. They do not have to tell everyone about the medication, and it is recommended to take it before going to school. In today’s reality, there are likely other children in the class who receive medication, but because they do not talk about it and take it before school, other children are unaware.
  • Collaboration with professionals: It is worth consulting a physician, pediatrician, or any other professional involved in the treatment to find the best solutions.
  • Patience: Changing habits takes time. It is important to remain patient and consistent, and to remember that medication is only part of the overall treatment. When children resist medication, it is also helpful to combine behavioral treatments and emotional support to help them cope with ADHD and achieve meaningful progress.

Questions and answers about treating attention deficit disorder

The recommendation is that parents will share, as it is important for school staff to be aware and provide feedback regarding social and academic functioning. The staff can provide a report to parents that will reflect the situation and indicate the effectiveness of the medication, for example: Until what time is their attention maintained? This report can, for example, help to understand whether the medication is appropriate or whether it may need to be changed.

A teacher may not refuse to admit children to class who are not taking medication for attention deficit disorder – even if they have been given a medical recommendation to take medication. However, a teacher may require students to sit during class without interruption and to abide by school rules, even if there are children who suffer from attention deficit disorder. 

One of the goals of treatment is that by adulthood the child will already know how they feel under medication and how they are without it. This way, as adults they will be able to make an informed decision about whether to take medication or not. Some people in adulthood choose careers and occupations where the symptoms of ADHD do not bother them, or perhaps even the opposite, for example in roles that require thinking outside the box.

Studies show that about 60% of children with ADHD will grow up to be adults with ADHD. In 40% of cases, the symptoms will subside and cease to bother them. Adults with ADHD are more likely to be distracted and impulsive, and less likely to suffer from restlessness. When ADHD is treated properly, it should not significantly interfere with or harm the child's potential.